Will we ever see these kinds of things again?

- Check it...I was at the mall the other day and I watched a scenario unfold that I've seen two or three times in my life. I was sitting in the food court eating when all of a sudden this little girl appears. She's crying. Apparently she's been separated from her mom and doesn't know where she went. And just like I've seen happen in the past, some woman goes over to the girl, tries to console her, then picks her up so they can go find the child's mother.

See, I can't do that. God forbid some kid ever gets lost and I'm the only adult around because that kid won't get any help. Now don't get me wrong. I feel for kids in this situation. But I ain't touching 'em. Because I know that the second that I tried to help, I'd hear (to paraphrase Dave Chappelle): "He still has her! (POP!) Let's just sprinkle some crack on him and get out of here." No sir-ee. If some kid is ever lost and looks to me for help, then I'll draw him a map and point him in the direction of the office. "Good luck, kid!"


- The question in the title refers to everything that follows. But I'm going to go ahead and answer the question now.

"No."


1985
*Michael still looked human.
*Lionel was more famous than Nicole.
*Stevie and Bruce trading off...if you don't love that then I wonder about you.
*Ray is no longer with us.
*Quincy Jones is a powerful man. Rumor has it that he warned everyone to leave their egos at home. Considering the fact that Diana Ross behaved, he must have been quite convincing.
*God didn't actually turn stone to bread. Satan tried to tempt Jesus into turning stone to bread.
*This brings back memories for me. My first grade teacher made us all learn the song and then sing it in front of the rest of the school and our parents. Apparently, my dad was so moved that he went out and bought the "Making of..." tape. Despite the fact that we did not own a VCR at the time. I remember watching it and thinking that there was one guy who just really seemed out of place. I later learned that his name is Dan Akroyd.




1989
*Ah...Doug E. Fresh's crew sporting the black trench coats with white sneakers. Classic.
*Big Daddy Kane seems rather modest here.
*Never did understand how Tone Loc got invited to this party.
*I know Heavy D was pretty popular at the time, but I think he's really been a slept on MC.
*Speaking of Heavy D: Trouble T-Roy...They Reminisce Over You.
*The prism of time is an interesting thing. It's fun to watch Flava Flav before he became an object of desire for golddiggers everywhere.




1990
*The younger brother here is either extremely brave or extremely stupid. Or possibly both. Probably both.
*I don't understand why the gang members just couldn't wear red and blue. I'll accept green, because I know there is (was?) a Treetop Piru set. But yellow? Yellow? I've never seen any self-respecting gang claim yellow as their color. They could have at least used purple.
*Seventeen years later...Michel'le's speaking voice still makes me smile.
*Dr. Dre was...skinny.
*Someone explain to me why MC Hammer is the butt of jokes while Puff Diddy (or whatever he's calling himself this week) is respected. Diddy is really just Hammer 2.0.
*Although it is funny to see MC Hammer hanging out with Eazy E.
*Oh yeah...Eazy E is no longer with us.
*We still thought Shock G and Humpty Hump were two different people.




1994
*Whenever I think of great bass players, I never think of Raphael Saadiq. But he always drops dope bass lines.
*D'Angelo had yet to disappear from our collective conscience. Although, to be fair, he had yet to appear in our collective conscience.
*By the way, D'Angelo looks like an 8th grader who just happened to start growing facial hair early.
*How can this movie take place and have been filmed in Houston but H-Town (the group) wasn't given more prominence in the song?
*We were not yet aware of the extracurricular activities of R. Kelly and Tevin Campbell.
*But that boy T.E.V.I.N. sho can sang!
*Boyz II Men was still a quartet.
*Gerald is no longer with us.
*What DID happen to the DeBarge family?
*How is it possible that Babyface was not affiliated with this project?
*I realize that any movie requires a certain level of belief suspension. But did they really have no other choice but to cast Allen Payne and Bokeem Woodbine as brothers? Are there any two black males on the planet who look less alike?